Buttercup

It all started that day when I was so worn out I could barely stand,

I flopped down in my chair with a wad of mail clutched in my hand.

My boots were soaked and pants all mud, but I really didn't care,

When I was able to move again I'd go put on another pair.

I went through it all, and except for some dude hawkin' his pills,

All I had to show for my effort was the usual collection of bills.

I was in a pretty bad mood and feeling all beat and sore,

So I just flung the mess in the air and left it scattered on the floor.

I wished that I had loads of money and was plenty fat and rich,

Instead of busting my back digging tules out of the ditch.

Cleve he came in and looked at that mail laying all around,

He eased on by and glanced at me, but never made a sound.

He picked up one that read Second Notice, and another sayin' you'd better pay,

It was plain for him to see that I wasn't having a real good day.

He poured a cup in the kitchen then straddled a chair across from me,

"There's a rodeo down at the fairgrounds, let's go have a look and see.

On the way out we can grab a beer or two down at Charlie's place,

And that should put a grin back on old Smily Jack's happy face."

I never moved an inch, just gave him the evil eye,

That grin on his face told me he thought he was being a funny guy.

"Jeez Jack, lighten up,you gonna sit here all night actin'' like a grouch,

Or maybe you'll wrap up in a blankie and go to sleep there on the couch?"

"Thanks Doctor Cleve, I feel better now, like you've straightened out my life,

But, if I needed someone to nag me I'd go hunt up my old ex-wife."

"Fine by me, but I'm gonna have a beer and go watch those bulls tonight,"

And that's when I made my near to fatal mistake, "OK, Fine, I'll go -- alright?"

I had a couple beers at Charlie's bar and was startin' to feel prime,

Maybe for once Cleve had a good idea and I'd have a pretty good time.

We drove on down to the rodeo grounds and paid our dollar at the gate,

I grabbed another beer from a stand and by now was feeling great.

I forgot all about my being mad and was no longer stiff and sore,

And by the time the broncs had bucked, well,  I'd had a couple more.

Then they ran the bulls on down the line and locked them in the chute,

And thats when the Announcer started talking about all that loot.

He was talkin' about this one guy, who'd won over forty grand so far,

And that he was on his way to wealth and glory as some kind of rodeo star.

I recall sayin' something to Cleve about how much that guy got paid,

And how he wasn't sloggin' around in ditches, and that he really had it made.

I think I said he made more then we cleared ranchin', and he did it at one show,

And I guess, something about missin' my callin', and ridin' bulls was the way to go.

I never saw it comin', that look Cleve gets when he's hatchin' something in his brain,

Or I would have got well clear of the track before getting run over by his train.

The next day was business as usual and I was patchin' up some fence,

My head was really poundin' and I was feelin' more'n a little dense.

When Cleve came up and asked me if I recalled last night, and all that I had said,

"Partner, I'm not in the mood for guessing games," as I shook my aching head.

"Remember about missin' your callin'', and how you could have made a fortune too?"

I squinted my eyes and thought real hard, "No, I don't recall I do."

"Well, I've set it all up for you, and you're gonna get the fortune that you seek,

I just went and entered you in the bull ridin', at the big Reno show next week."

I just stood there holding that wire as the words sunk slowly in,

"I'm not sure I heard you right, would you run that by me once again."

"Just a few seconds ridin' a bull and you'll make more'n we made all year,

So I went and got you entered; now we need to get you some bull ridin' gear."

I started in to laughing, "Good one pard, you really gave my leg a pull,

Like as if I know the first thing about ridin' on a bull."

Then I started getting nervous cause Cleve wasn't laughin' with me in kind,

"I paid a hundred dollar entry fee, and if you don't ride, then you'll get fined."

I stood there with my mouth hung open not really knowing what to say,

Cleve slapped me on the back, "We'll be rich men, just one week from today."

I tried to stay cool and calm, "Okay Cleve, I'm not really all that thrilled,"

Then I lost it and screamed in his face, "What?  You trying to get me killed?"

"Jack, its no different than ridin' broncs, and you've rode plenty of those,

You just have to stay in the middle, which ever way that critter blows.

If you can ride a bronc you can ride a bull, I don't see how it really matters?"

"Cause broncs don't have horns eight feet wide and hooves like turkey platters!"

The day finally came for us to hit the road and goin' south for my last ride,

And I wondered what they'd say at my funeral and tell of how I died?

Would they say I was a hero and at Charlie's all raise a glass,

Or say, "Ol' Jack got stomped to death ridin' a bull, boy what a stupid ___,"

I got a bull rope and glove from a pal, who'd used them in his high school days,

The glove had more holes than swiss cheese and the rope was a bundle of frays.

Seems a bull had stepped on his head and it convinced him that he should quit,

Here, I'd always thought it was his hat, but I guess it was his head that didnt fit.

Names like Horns of Death and Head-Ripper-Offer, in my mind is what I saw,

But I couldn't believe my eyes when I read the name of the bull that was my draw.

Cleve looked over my shoulder, "Buttercup?  Partner this'll be a piece of cake,

I'll bet a little girl could ride him, just think of all the money were gonna make!"

Two cowboys came up behind us to check for their draws written on that sheet,

"Hey, some guy named Jack's drawed Buttercup, yeah, that ol' boys dead meat.

Now, if it was me who drawed ol Buttercup, there wouldn't be no doubt,

I don't care how much they fined me; I'd be turning that monster out!"

As those boys walked away I gave Cleve that I'll get you for this look,

Someday I'll make you pay for this, no matter how many years it took.

Well, little Buttercup was as big as a boxcar, with horns like Ponderosa trunks,

And a hump the size of Mount Everest, and he'd been sprayed by a herd of skunks.

He was mad as hell and throwin' snot, and bellerin' for all that he was worth,

And I knew these last few minutes would be my last upon this earth.

I slid my hand under the rope and got my shakin' knees down on his back,

As a preacher came up to the fence and the paramedics picked up their pack.

Well, I survived that wild ride, but they didn't need to tally up no score,

Cause I was a-flyin' through the air before they could even count to four.

I landed hard on my head and folks was yellin' at me, to get on my feet and go,

When that sucker put a horn to my Wranglers and put me up in the second row.

Well, now, I'm sittin' here with little Buck and my bruises have all healed,

And what I've been waitin' for has come, all official, signed, and sealed.

"Hey partner, come on in here, something real special came for you today,"

I handed him a pink hat with a little crown, he just stared, not  knowin' what to say.

"If you don't like pink, maybe we can get it in your favorite color, dollar bill green,

"Didn't I tell you?  I've set it all up; you're in the runnin' for the next Elko rodeo queen."

                                                                                                                    Dave P. Fisher